I, Sam, would like to offer a blanket statement to the effect that the mistress is up to no good. In fact, she is trying to smear the good name of a perfectly respectable lady dog of mature years by insinuating that she and I would possibly have any sort of feelings for each other beyond a mutual distrust of rabbits.
Dangerous, blood-thirsty rabbits, I should add, ones who traipse across our yard - I mean my yard, and the mature lady dog assists me in the barking and chasing...
The mistress claims that I sit outside the door of the lady dog's domicile and wait for her. This is untrue. I simply happen to be walking by very slowly and prepared to greet her should she by chance emerge. It's pure happenstance that I insisted upon going outside at 11:30 last night just as the mature lady dog also happened to be taking a stroll.
